“The towel war”

The Towel War: Who Gave You Permission to Occupy a Sun Lounger?

By Tami Lancut Leibovitz | Master of Manners

Summer is here. The heat is here. The watermelon is here. The ice cream is here. And, of course, one of the most familiar summer rituals at hotel pools, resorts and beaches has returned: the towel war.

“The towel war” is the humorous name for a very familiar phenomenon: vacationers and swimmers place a towel, a flip-flop, a book or a water bottle on a sun lounger — not because they are using it at that moment, but in order to mark it as theirs for hours ahead. In practice, the chair remains empty, other people search for a place to sit, and the shared space quietly becomes a small battlefield of territory.

It often begins early in the morning. A determined family representative goes down to the hotel pool, armed with four colorful towels, sunscreen, a book and one strategically placed flip-flop. The mission: to conquer four sun loungers in the front row.

By seven in the morning, the territory is marked.
The family? They may arrive around noon, after breakfast, coffee and perhaps a short nap.

So, no.
A towel is not a land registry document.
A flip-flop is not a rental agreement.
And an empty water bottle is not proof of ownership over a sun lounger.

Is This an Israeli Phenomenon? Not at All

Although it may feel very local, the towel war is well known around the world. In Europe, especially in hotels and holiday resorts, the issue has become a symbol of the small yet very emotional battles over shared public space.

In some hotels, staff members remove towels that have been left for too long on empty loungers. In certain beaches in Italy and Spain, local regulations and even fines may apply when people leave equipment unattended in order to reserve space for long periods.

The message is simple:
A sun lounger is not occupied territory.
It is a place to sit — when someone is actually sitting there.

What Does Etiquette Say?

From an etiquette point of view, the difference is between reasonable use and taking over shared space.

If you have gone into the sea, stepped away to the restroom, bought an ice cream for your child or brought back a bottle of water — of course your towel can remain. That is a short and reasonable pause.

But if you have left for lunch, gone back to your room for a nap, gone shopping or decided to reserve several loungers “just in case” — the chair should be released.

Shared space, whether at a beach, hotel pool or resort, is meant to be enjoyed by everyone. It is not meant to become private property by means of a towel.

Etiquette is not only about forks and knives. Etiquette is the ability to notice the person walking around in the heat with children, searching for one small piece of shade.

The Do and Don’t of the Towel War

Do:
Reserve a place only for a short and reasonable time, when you are truly nearby and returning shortly.

Don’t:
Do not turn a towel, flip-flop or water bottle into the bodyguard of a sun lounger while you disappear for hours.

Or, with a smile:
Do not send your towel to conquer a sun lounger on your behalf. It is not your legal representative.

A Few Simple Rules for a More Pleasant Summer

Do not reserve six loungers “just in case Aunt Sima joins us later.” Aunt Sima may be wonderful, but until she arrives, she does not need a chair.

Do not spread a beach mat the size of a three-room apartment across half the beach. A family needs space — but so do other families.

When you are finished using a lounger, release it. Do not leave your towel behind as if you are still there just to keep your options open.

If you see a chair that appears to have been “reserved” for a long time by a lonely towel and a tired water bottle, do not shout, do not move things aggressively and do not turn it into a war. At a hotel, speak to the staff. At the beach or pool, ask politely:

“Excuse me, is anyone using this chair now?”

And if someone returns much later and says, “That’s mine,” you may smile and say:

“The chair had been empty for quite a while, so we assumed it had returned to the public.”

The Bottom Line

Summer invites us to enjoy the sun, the sea, the pool, family time, cold drinks and freedom. But even within freedom, there is etiquette — and within etiquette, there is consideration.

Before we throw a towel onto a chair and turn it into our private territory, it is worth asking one simple question:

Am I actually using this space — or am I taking it over?

Because a towel can save a place for a few minutes.
It cannot manage real estate.

Wishing everyone a pleasant, cool and considerate summer.

©All Rights Reserved to Tami Lancut Leibovitz